i am having lots of convos with all very nice people. just one that made me laugh out really loud was this with sihui:

sihui says:
HEY PNG!

sihui says:
LONG TIME NO SEE

hug says:
heyy sihui!!

hug says:
hahahaah

hug says:
yea man

hug says:
you and ur nice rebonded hair

sihui says:
i love u phg

sihui says:
png

sihui says:
thx u

hug says:
haha

sihui says:
HAHAHAHAHA

hug says:
-.-!

hug says:
dramatic reaction hahahaha

HAHA lol i really did laugh out loud :D first time of today that was genuine and ticklish and a real joke laugh. feels good.
just feel like writing. i want to thank all those you know who yh chatty chris tiffy gang sweejin sihui brenda yicen beatrice(naming much that i have encountered today) all of you for being so nice to me. of course, there are also many more people who have touched me in one way or another those few tumultuous days back that no words can express all gratitude i have. that we are supporting one another though most are having bursting heads and confused hearts makes me feel good. really, there's no words to be able to convey weird emotions that sway from one to another, jumping from one to another or clump together making one able to feel guilt happiness and gloom all at once. somehow, i don't know what i need anymore just to make me feel right. im suddenly lost, yet i am found again. im sorry if i have ever disappointed you, in choice, words and actions. i wish i can be who i want to be, yet i do things that i do not want to do (taking inspiration from paul). just that same feeling that goes on and on, i can't stop. i wish, but there's a weird sense of guilt to wish. what is correct? i find myself, always in doubt of this that everything. so many things. yet i shld be happy, because i had what i wanted. i am, but i do have some gloom at the same time. i just wish, to know, to do what i ought to do. but i know today, many have encouraged me. i was encouraged too. for a moment, i allowed myself to believe that i am walking the right path, however cloudy it seems now. i hope i walk in faith...